How often have I walked into a situation / meeting / relationship / room and didn’t act on my gut? Too often. In fact, as I become aware of how our intuition plays a role in our happiness and impact — the more I am leaning towards acting on my gut.
You see — the greatest regret of every human at the end of their days is one simple irreversible feeling:
The greatest regret is having NOT done what they loved or NOT said how they feel. — Ware
Knowing they forfeited their chance in life to have seen, done, loved, grew, savored, and felt is crushing. To think you and I can make the same mistake is terrifying!
Making a change today is worth it
Fortunately for you and I, as we have breath in our chests, we can change today. Change will allow you the following benefits:
- Better impact at work, who doesn’t want to see success in their craft!
- Healthier and more passionate relationships, lasting love is possible
- Experiences and life moments free of regret and filled with happiness (success or failure does not diminish the act of having done/acted)
No more ‘I wish”, “ I said” or “could have” moments
To change your behavior you first need to become aware. To do this, try and notice when — in any moment — you walk away or sit there wishing you had said / done something. You’ll know as you’ll have a little sinking feeling as the moment begins to pass.
Example #1: Your loved one did something that upset you, but you didn’t say anything … then days/weeks/years later that moment has turned into a poison in your heart, and eventually you begin to raise it up in arguments. Simply saying your feelings in the moment would have disarmed it — and in most cases revealed a misunderstanding!
Example #2: In a meeting for work you are surrounded by all your peers and people who you trust fully. A big challenge is ahead and ideas are floated to solve it. You, in your heart/mind, see a risk to the popular idea …. yet you say nothing. The group approves it, and 3 months down the line the business fails because of the risk YOU SAW. Now your inner monologue is screaming with self righteousness and guilt. Had you spoken up, maybe you could have saved the business; everyone could stay together, and you would be free of regret.
These are examples of these ‘moments’… back to you seeing them in your life.
If you just stare at it as it passes, yes you’ll not get what you want. You will not better the group, and you will certainly not be more intimate with those in your life.
The good news is … the more you feel and see these moments, the more you practice ACTING. In the beginning you may have to jump in and say — ‘HOLD ON… I wanted to add one more thing’. That simple. Never dwell. Never settle. Share your authentic self.
Stages of the the moment:
- The moment occurs and you desire to share / help / give / do
- As time carries on you really recognize the power of your intuition
- At some point you begin to feel the moment begin to change. It is changing because the impact and value of what you believe to be true is leaving
- Finally, the meeting is done; the girl is gone; the opportunity to help that person in need is gone
- Now the only memory of this moment is regret. Regret for the unsaid words; lack of action, and the “what could have been moment” for that person, team, and you.
Acting with good intentions and your intuition
It must be said that we must act with good intentions. In nearly all cases we are acting for the good of others, our community, and equally ourselves. Each of us gives more and less to each of these three recipients and that is OK. There is no score, but what matters is — the intention.
- Speak up in meetings to HELP others, not in spite of another.
- Chime in and give compliments with friends instead of complaining and spreading poison/gossip
- Share your ideas and experience to benefit others — it doesn’t have to benefit you
- Go on that hike, jump in that beautiful water, and just do things that call to your heart.
Living is the experiences you make, create, and participate in. Building a life of experiences with a foundation of good intentions can only make your world better. Who doesn’t want to be around and support those who lift them up and speak honestly to them!?
Just because you share/give doesn’t make you right!
This needs to be known. Just because you love the girl and share that with her, doesn’t mean she loves you too. It only means you have opened your heart to someone and let them know. That very act creates the chance for a life of possibility together, but also could save you from a long period of a one-sided relationship.
Acting on our intuition will free you of regret and worry. You’ll eliminate —
I wish I did …
I should have said …
I would have …
I could have …
…and isn’t that wonderful? It also means you will be wrong. Have the humility to share without expectation. What you share may not be the best for the group, person, family, or business. It is your contribution that could help each become amazing, and that is why you share it — for their benefit.
Their benefit is what you give to the moment. Your benefit is a life full of reward built around being who you truly are, your greatest self, and without regret. Isn’t that enough!
About the author
- Coach, Mentor, 3x author
- 24 Year technology executive
- Helped launch clouds for EMC and Cisco
- GOOGLE, Microsoft FEDRAMP & ISO 27001 — Oversaw / Part of team deploying / Managed Cloud Compliance
James — executive to deliver products to market; author; inventor; speaker, and technologist with decades of experience across all technology and cybersecurity. (LinkedIN to connect and engage)
James is a leader that has balanced product market success with rapid regulations, cyber, customer demands, and supplier challenges at Honeywell, Google, and Microsoft in the recent past. Successful in building large teams and influence driven initiatives that have saved millions in new revenue and savings for Honeywell. Passionate about the product creation process; the value of intertwining privacy and quality together, and the opportunity present through branding and value.
James leads with the Senior Leadership across the globe and partners for critical priorities at Honeywell to identify new innovation opportunities through strategy and practical implementations within the Azure cloud, machine learning, artificial intelligence, and industrial products.
James has grown business and brands from zero to $50MM as a founder, owner, and within the Fortune 200. A track record built with wins and losses, that are always building on his network across the globe with the best technologists and great peers to bring the best talent and resources to each project.
James began transforming the Honeywell supply chain strategy that have delivered efficiencies (reduction of idea to signature) and pragmatic development of partnerships that have expanded our market offerings across Honeywell.
James’ continues to lead and advise on their cloud strategy, cloud innovation, cost consolidation, cyber security, and compliance across the various businesses within Honeywell.